Go back to work or not go back to work? That was the question... With our due date falling in January, I had a few options to consider:
- Go back to school, take my 6 weeks maternity leave in January then finish out the last of 3+ months of the school year.
- Go back to school then take a leave of absence and not return after winter break.
- Don't go back...
As soon as we found out the news, David was on board with #3. We have been preparing for it so we are ready to swing it financially and he didn't want me to be stressed or overworked during the pregnancy (to be the teacher I want to be I put in 10-12 hour work days most of the time). We had also said, "If we get pregnant by May, I won't go back." We got our first positive on May 5th. I'd say that's pushing it but a plan is a plan and David was going to hold me to it.
I decided that #2 was out of the question as I felt that it was a very selfish option. Yes I would get tenure and would have super cheap health insurance for the pregnancy and birth, but my kiddos would have two different teachers for each half of the school year. Not an option in my opinion.
As for option #1, it would seem to be the most sensible for the average working person. I went back and forth about it for a while. The primary driver for this option was how early it was in the pregnancy. I just knew that something would go wrong the day after I submitted my resignation and then I'd be stuck without a baby or a job. David and my mom were quick to reassure me that, even if something did happen, things would still be okay.
When it came down to it, my life goal since high school has been to be a stay-at-home mom. I have a degree in Early Childhood Education because of this dream and it would be crazy for me to miss out on 3 precious months of my baby's life that I would never get back just to make some extra money and teach some other people's kids. I decided to go with option #3: don't go back...
It was not a decision that I made lightly. I understand that in current economic times, people are out of work and desperate to find employment. I felt so guilty just walking away from an amazing job with equally amazing benefits. I also felt like I was putting all of my eggs in one basket and walking into the unknown (which is still a little scary).
During our journey to conception, I had finally adopted the mantra of needing to live my life the way it currently is, not for what it could be. This helped me greatly when we weren't getting pregnant month after month and things weren't going as planned (and I was going crazy). Now that the tables had turned, however, it was more difficult to accept that I was finally pregnant and make the life changes for that reality.
My plan now is to work smaller odd jobs until mid-December then take that last month to finish baby prep, relax and enjoy my hubby until Baby comes. Sounds like an amazing plan to me!!!