Confessions

Last night was another good night for Ayden.  He went down around 8:00pm, I gave him his dream feed at 10:00pm, he woke up hungry around 2:45am, he woke again around 4:30am because he had spit up and was laying in it, poor little guy. He woke up hungry again around 6:00am and that's when I brought him into bed with me (David was already up for the day).  Now that he's sleeping in his own room, his first morning feeding and the couple hours of cuddling and dozing together afterward is one of my favorite parts of the morning, along with kissing and hugging my honey goodbye <3.  

<3 Our little snuggle bug, sleeping in. <3

Playtime is also getting so fun!  I used to try to time it so Little Miss and Ayden would nap at the same time so that I could nap too.  Now that I'm getting a little more sleep, I use her nap times as my one on one time with Ayden.  He's so funny because he loves to roll to his belly.  He'll get over then push up and smile but after a few minutes he starts to get frustrated and "calls" for help.  I'll flip him back to his back and he'll do it all over again.  I suppose it's all part of the process for learning to roll from stomach to back now.

I have been keeping some pretty important feelings to myself for a while now and decided to finally voice them to David today.  I don't want to watch Little Miss anymore.  I'm so torn in so many ways on this subject.  

Reasons to watch her:

1) Having the supplemental income makes us comfortable so that we can be a little more flexible with our spending/have a little wiggle room from month to month.

2) Her mom is a long time friend of mine and has always given me summer work/extra jobs whenever I've wanted them (She owns a pet store and I worked there through college).  I like helping her out and giving back to her in this way.

3) It's only 2 days a week. 

Reasons not to watch her:

1) Being a stay at home mom has always been my dream.  I want our children spaced out in age so that I can give each one the chance to be a baby and also give them all of the one-on-one attention they need to grow and develop.  I feel this will help me be present and intentional with my parenting.  I strongly feel that Little Miss takes a lot of my attention away from Ayden on the days that she is here and even decreases my overall patience at times (ie, when she is calling out for more snack while Ayden is fighting sleep and crying, etc.).  This is NOT okay with me.

2) Little Miss doesn't like to play with toys.  I can pull out an entire room of age-appropriate toys and she will still find anything and everything non-toy that she can to play with.  I understand that this is all part of being a toddler, my degree is in Early Childhood Education after all; but as I mentioned above having to monitor her so closely while she plays takes away valuable time I could be spending focusing on my own baby.

3) On the days she is here I can't (and shouldn't since my job is to engage with her) get any house work done.  My vision of myself as a stay at home mom, home maker, house wife, whatever you want to call it was that I would make time to shape and mold our children, workout regularly, keep the house CLEAN, and have dinner ready when David gets home.  That way we have the rest of the evening to relax and enjoy each other as a family.   On the days she's here the house is a wreck and I don't even think about dinner until after David is home.

4) Like I say over and over, being a stay-at-home mom has always been my dream and this is it.  Once our children are grown it will be over.  If I feel like I'm only living my dream half way right now, and there are no do-overs,  something's got to change.

You may be saying to yourself, "Geeze, it's only two days a week!" and this is true but that leaves me having to pick up the slack on the other days and I constantly feel like I'm playing catch up.  

After  finally voicing all of these concerns to David, we came up with two possible solutions.  David's was to just call it quits.  No amount of money is more important than happiness or living a dream to its full potential (isn't he so wonderful?!?) and mine was that I would cut the hours down and take Little Miss to her mom's store around 2 or 2:30.  That would give me a few hours before David gets home to get things in order.  I think I'll start with my idea and if I'm still feeling like I'm only living my dream half way then I'll just tell her mom it's not working out.  It is as simple as that.  We only live this life once and you make your own happiness.

In the meantime, my solution to getting through the day with my sanity in tact is to get out of the house after lunch.  Today, I engaged in some retail therapy at Target.

Ayden in the Moby, Little Miss in the cart :)

It was so much more pleasant being out of the house!  Among a few other things, I got Ayden some summer clothes.  He's beginning to outgrow his 0-3 month clothes and after going through the 3-6 month stuff my sisters gave me, and finding most of it to be winter clothes, I decided we'd have to get at least a few outfits for him:

Sun hat and swim shirt (no sunscreen until 6 months...)

3 piece set

HAD to get the guitar romper!

Just for fun! :)

I'm keeping the tags on for now.  I'll scope out the local consignment stores to see if I can find some super cute, super cheap stuff and if I do, I'll return the above clothes. :)

Putting him to bed tonight was a DREAM!!  We are really making some headway in the bedtime department, as long as we get the timing right.  Not a single fuss, he just laid there listening to me reading a story while David and I stood over him admiring how cute he is, got sleepy and went to sleep.  It was as easy as that.  Hopefully we're on our way to that kind of bedtime every night!

Are you living your dream?  Did you have to make any hard decisions/sacrifices to get there?

~Sarah

Daddy, The Baby Whisperer :)

Getting Ayden to bed last night was a bit of a challenge.  I had unfortunately forgotten to pack his overnight diaper and PJs so we had to change him when we got home.  He had fallen asleep in his car seat and it would have been amazing to just give him a dream feed then transfer him right to his crib but instead we had to change his diaper which woke him up enough to fight falling back to sleep.  I was SO exhausted so David swooped in to save the day, or rather saved the night!  He was so wonderful.  He walked Ayden around bouncing, swaying and patting.  He even stopped to give him a hug every now and then and I could tell he was enjoying the feeling of his son falling asleep on him so much.  When Ayden began to cry when he put him in his crib, David knew just what to do.  He patted his bottom and shushed in his ear until he quieted and fell asleep for the night.  He was my life saver and I again was reminded how happy that I am to have such a great partner in this parenting thing.  It is not always easy and as I've said before, it is so wonderful to have someone to pass the baton to when you need it!  We were all in bed for 11 hours straight.  I probably got around 7 hours total throughout the night.  Not too bad :). 

Today, we had a much needed stay home day.  

We ate breakfast al fresco:

Then hung out on our deck for a while enjoying the morning sun and reading The Hunger Games.

Polly enjoyed a little sun bathing too :)

We (mostly David) got our little backyard vegetable garden started.  We can't wait to eat the veggies we grow!  We planted broccoli, spaghetti squash, zucchini, yellow squash, green and red belle peppers, jalapenos and tomatoes.  We need a few more containers for our carrots, onions and herbs but that will be a project for next weekend.  Now we are just hoping that the cute little bunny that has taken residence under our deck won't come out and snack on it all tonight.

And I sunned our diapers.  I hadn't sunned them in a WHILE so they were pretty stained.  

Before and after.  Truly amazing!!

It's amazing how the sun bleaches them so well and so quickly!  They are as good as new.  Too bad they'll be stained again the next time he wears them.  Hopefully I can sun them all summer long!

After lunch, we showered and then gave Ayden a bath.  He is getting a bit more difficult to bathe since he wants to sit up and roll over the whole time.  He still loves it though! As for the rest of our day, David helped me get the house back in order and then we went for a walk and had an AMAZING dinner!  

Clasping his little monkey toes!

Such a fun and productive family day!

Hugs!

What do you do during your stay home weekend days?

~Sarah

Derby Day!

May 5th. We found out we were pregnant a year ago today! And what a truly amazing year it has been...

This is the face of a baby who slept ALL night!!

We put Ayden to bed at 8:45 then gave him his dream feed around 10:30 when we went to bed. He woke at 3am for a feeding, again around 5:30am and then we were up for the day at around 8 or so. If you're counting, that's somewhere around 10 hours of sleep total!!

Now that doesn't mean that Mommy got that much sleep... We had a HUGE thunderstorm with bright, flashing lightning and thunder that shook the house. One thunder boom woke me at 1:30 and I unfortunately stayed awake until after his 3am feeding. I tried and tried to go back to sleep but all I could do was lay there and worry about 1) if the storm was going to wake and scare Ayden, 2) if the storm was going to take out our electricity preventing us from hearing him on the monitor and 3) that he would wake up right after I fell asleep anyway. Needless to say, I don't feel anymore rested than I do any other day but my spirits are up knowing that we may be getting somewhere with this sleep thing!

All I can say is that timing is everything (laying him down before he's over tired, preferably after his first yawn) and that dream feeding is where it's at! Our dream feed was only 3 ounces because that's all i got when i pumped right after I fed him. You are supposed to give half of their body weight in ounces. Ayden is somewhere between 11 and 12 pounds so ideally we would give him around 6 ounces or so for it to be a full feeding. I had read that some babies don't wake enough on the first few tries to take a whole dream feeding so I didn't worry about giving just 3 ounces. It was all an experiment last night anyway!

So once we were up and at 'em today, we had breakfast, put Ayden down for an hour long nap (!!) and got ready for the day. When he woke up, we headed out to the farmer's market to get some vegetable plants for our container garden.

Our big sleeper!!

While there we saw this awesome dog:

We thought that maybe the owners were CATS fans??
It was just a guess.
The pic on the right shows that the dog had a wildcat on its side... 

And ran into a couple from our birth class who had their baby a week before we had Ayden. It was nice to see them and catch up. I think we're going to try to organize a little reunion for everyone.

Then it was Derby time!!

If you could see Ayden's onsie a little better,
you'd see that his head is the head for the jockey. :)

 I've lived in KY my whole life and have never been to the actual Derby... We always just get some family and friends together and have our own little party. We usually all go to a race course called Keeneland and have a little pot luck while we bet on and watch the day's races through simulcast. This year, however, we decided with all of the kids and babies that are in our family now, it would be easier to just have a party at my parent's house.

Pretty pooped after all of the visiting at the party...

We had a great time visiting with our friends and family. David even won a whole $20 for coming in second place for the hat drawing!

We finished the evening hanging out with our four favorite friends (the same friends that stayed late after David's birthday last weekend).

Ayden was SUCH a trooper all day! Probably thanks to all the sleep he had last night. He smiled and cooed at everyone as he was passed around and even showed off his new ability to roll over earlier in the day. It took 3 months but we're pretty sure he's decided that the world and all the strange people in it are pretty cool after all :).

Now it's after 11 and we're just now pulling into our neighborhood. I have no idea how tonight will go sleep wise because there has been absolutely nothing routine about it but I hope we have another good night because this mommy is EXHAUSTED!

~Sarah

The Ugliest Veg In Town...

Getting my blog post published early yesterday was so nice!  Ayden and I got the grocery shopping out of the way so now we have to whole weekend to enjoy the Kentucky Derby and some family time!

Leaving the grocery.
He prefers for his legs to dangle from the Moby now.
Even more of a conversation starter now!

While at the grocery we purchased the ugliest vegetable in existence...

Hello, celery root!

I peeled it: 

Sliced it one way...

then another...

Threw all the pieces in a bowl and tossed it with this stuff:

(EVOO, sea salt, paprika, cayenne and garlic powder)

Baked them in the oven on 400* for about 20 minutes or so:

And ended up with some pretty good "french fries"

We were surprised with how good they were!  They had a similar consistency to real french fries and only had a slight hint of celery flavor.  I think the garlic, paprika and cayenne did a pretty good job masking it, though, because David said he couldn't taste celery at all.  I think next time we make them I'll cook them a little longer so they'll get a little more crispy.  Who needs potatoes when you have the ugliest veg in town to make fries from?!?

We ended the evening with a beautiful sunset:

The pic doesn't even do it justice...

My two favorite boys!

We were in bed by 8:30 for some reading and all asleep by 9:30.  It was glorious!

Today went by so fast!  Ayden was up about every two hours last night.  I have to admit, I'm more than ready to get back to 3+ hours at a time!!  As I was up with Ayden in the middle of the night, I was skimming through The No-Cry Sleep Solution.  I decided to look in the index for "growth spurts" to read the author's thoughts on the subject and came across an interesting tid bit.  Right in the same section as growth spurts, she also mentioned that babies can have interrupted sleep during developmental milestones.  Apparently they wake up with an urge to practice it in the middle of the night.  Funny that I read that the day after Ayden mastered rolling over...  There just seem to be so many reasons that babies don't sleep.  It's a wonder they every manage to get any at all!

We woke up around 7am, had the dog to the groomer by 9am (YAY for *less* shedding!!) and then came home and took a nap together.  Ayden slept for an hour and a half!  I snuggled with him the whole time but only managed to doze for about a half hour of it.  Even though David and I both feel that I should make napping a priority after a night of poor sleep, I just kept thinking of everything I should have been doing instead.  Oh well...  At least I got to savor some amazing snuggle time with my little love.

Our cutie in his first outfit of the day...

second outfit of the day...

When Ayden woke up, we put dinner on in the crock pot:

Went to pick up the dog at the groomer then headed to teach dance.

Napping in the swing to the sounds of loud music and tapping :)
<3 LOVE how he's holding onto his little giraffe <3

After skimming through The No-Cry Sleep Solution last night, I decided that we needed to do better with a bedtime routine.  We were planning on starting next week but the opportunity arose tonight!  I caught him after his first yawn, took him to his room, dimmed the lights, turned on his soother/projector, changed him into his nighttime diaper and massaged his legs while I talked to him quietly about our day, and then put him in his crib.  He watched his projector for a while, sucked on his hands a little, fussed maybe twice then rolled over on his belly and fell asleep.  And that was that...  I felt so proud of both of us!  This is what we've been working towards.  He fell asleep at 8:45pm and it'll be fun to see how long it lasts.  Even if it's just 30 minutes it is a step in the right direction!  Now David and I are going to have a little Netflix date night and I think I might pump to give Ayden a "dream feed" without getting him out of his crib. 

Such a big boy already! 

~Sarah

In Charge!

Last night was rough...

Keeping cool, sans swaddle...

We were up every two hours or less. Somehow I had a very clear head about it all and just kept telling myself, "He's a baby who needs to learn how to sleep and it's your job to teach him."

In the middle of the night, after it had cooled off a little, I put him in a light weight sleep sack and into his crib. He watched his soother, rolled to his side and peacefully fell asleep. It only lasted about 40 minutes (just long enough for me to get back to bed, wind down again and start to doze). I fed him and put him back in, this time for about an hour. At that point, I swaddled him and brought him back into our room. He slept in his Rock and Play Sleeper for about 2 hours and then when he woke hungry around 6am or so I brought him into our bed. We slept off and on together until about 9am. It's those last few co-sleeping hours after a night like that that save me! I can see how tired parents can easily end up co-sleeping all the time. David and I are determined to keep our bed our own, though, and it makes those morning snuggles that much more special. We're just hoping it is another growth spurt and that Ayden will be back to sleeping in bigger chunks next week.

After waking at 9am it didn't leave us much time to get ready for our Thursday bookstore story time. I rushed around showering, getting myself ready, getting Ayden ready, getting breakfast, getting the pets taken care of and getting out the door in about a hour and a half. I even took some time from getting ready to catch Ayden's newest big accomplishment on video!

So he rolled over for the first time a couple of days ago and I think it was half way on accident. This morning he totally figured out how to do it on purpose. I never knew a 3 month old could feel pride at his own accomplishments but I could see it all over his face and could hear it in his excited little squeal.

Now he's in charge of his own tummy time :).

"They" say you aren't supposed to put a baby in a position that they can't get into by themselves. I've been cautiously putting Ayden to sleep for naps on his belly for weeks now. I will continue to survey possible suffocation hazards but now that he can get to his belly on his own, I feel I can relax a little about him sleeping that way.

Sooo, back to our day... My sister, nephew and niece met us at story time. Ayden was ready for his nap about 2/3 of the way through so I stood with him on my shoulder where he fell asleep. He snoozed while we let my nephew play and we browsed around the book store. We fed the ducks in the pond behind the shopping center and then my sis treated me to some brown rice sushi at Whole Foods. It was delicious!  Some much needed sister time :).

Feeding the ducks and fish.

Hanging in his cousins' stroller :).

Ayden fell asleep on the way home. I laid in bed with him, trying to nap as well but couldn't, so I just enjoyed the snuggles, meal planned/made the grocery list and am now writing this post. I know I've said it before but I'd really like to start writing my posts earlier so that I can snuggle with David and go to sleep when Ayden does. Today I'll actually do it!

<3 My view.  So sweet!! <3

According to FlyLady, Thursday is supposed to be errand day so I've decided to start doing the grocery shopping on my own on Thursdays. When I approached David with this idea he sweetly said, "Are you sure? It's kind of our thing...". I told him that yes I was sure that it would free up that time on Sundays for weekly meal prep since we make our own cereal, kale chips, etc. every week. We can do that together and it can become "our thing."  Currently, we're always too tired/busy to do it when we get home from the grocery and it doesn't get done until Tuesday or later when half of theweek is already over.

Now I am going to feed Ayden and head to Whole Foods for the 2nd time today (too bad I didn't have my grocery list made earlier, huh?). Luckily we just live a hop, skip and a jump away!

What's your family's "thing"?

~ Sarah

Story Time Fail...

Soooo... I tried to take the kids to toddler storytime today but:

Yeah, bummer!!

But we still stayed and played a little.

There were two boys who were just a little bit older than Little Miss there with their moms. The moms were chatting and the boys were hoarding all the train tracks telling Little Miss "No!" in not so nice tones. I had to step in and make them share while I made a mental note to try my best to always be present for Ayden. I know some days are more difficult than others for moms, especially when a child gets old enough to utilize their free will, but those boys were giving their moms perfect teaching opportunities and they just passed them by... I also reminded myself that I had no idea what their mornings were like. Maybe they just both needed a break.

It got close to 90* today!! Ummm, Mother Nature, it's only May. I think we're in for a doozy of a Summer which should be interesting with a baby. When the temperature gets to the upper 80's and higher, our air conditioning just can't keep up. It was so hot in our house (around 78*) that Ayden just could not get comfortable for his late afternoon nap. I finally gave in, stripped him down to his diaper and nursed him to sleep. The nap was short but it was better than nothing and held him off until about 8:45.

We had spaghetti squash with meat sauce for dinner (one of our faves!) and while the squash roasted we took a family walk. It had cooled down just enough and felt so pleasant compared to earlier in the day since KY gets sooo humid :(.  We always have such good conversation while we  go for walks together.

It's still 76* in our room so I've just got Ayden in a onsie and no swaddle. Yikes! I'm keeping the Swaddle Me close by, though. Worst case, I just put it on him and nurse him back to sleep. We're also trying out one of our new Kissaluvs Marvel fitted diapers for the first time tonight (we got 2). They get great reviews and I'm excited to see how we like them.

What do you do to keep your babies cool in the Summer?

~Sarah

We Have A Roller!

The one arm swaddle seems to be working for us.

It's cute to see Ayden with his little hand up by his face when I wake up to check on him throughout the night. I can't wait until he can sleep comfortably straight jacket free!

He still woke up a lot during the second half of the night last night but we think it's because he may be getting hot? It's been staying in the low 70's all night, so tonight we're going to try to turn the temperature down and see if it helps. We just keep remembering how well he slept the night of our backyard camping when it was only 45*. We'll see! Constantly troubleshooting... What else is there to do?

Ayden rolled from his back to his stomach today!! Of course I didn't catch the roll itself on camera but I did catch his pride in the aftermath :).

The funniest part about it was that he was fussing himself to sleep as usual and once he rolled over he stopped fussing, thought about it for a second, then was all smiles. Man, I think our kid just gets cuter by the day!!

He eventually did fall asleep and I managed to get in 20 minutes of Yoga while he slept.

I also made another pinspired craft today:

My inspiration pin

It turned out so cute!

Right now, I'm nursing Ayden on the bench in our back yard, enjoying a beautiful evening! It was supposed to storm but didn't. WIN! :). We are grilling pork chops and broccoli and plan to get in bed early so we can dive into The Hunger Games for a while.

Have you made anything from Pinterest? I'd love for you to share your favorite pins with me!

~Sarah