Thursday, December 20, 2012

Team Work

Today was a busy but day! We went to story time and then ran errands in the rain and Ayden was a super trooper! Where's the snow, December?!?

What I want to focus on today is my partner in crime and love of my life.

This man is amazing! I'm not sure what in the world I'd do without him. Before Ayden was born our routine usually consisted of him chilling on the couch while I made dinner during the week and both of us tackling household to do's on the weekends. David would take care of the outside chores (mowing, trash, garage, cars, etc) and I'd take care of the inside (dishes, laundry, groceries, etc). This arrangement worked well for us but things have changed a lot since Ayden's arrival.

During the first month or so when Ayden was nursing so much and I was a hormonal, exhausted mess, David really stepped up and took care of business. He went to work, went to the grocery, did all the cooking, ran the vacuum regularly (without being asked sometimes!) and also was a hands on dad. Since we knew I'd be a stay-at-home mom our original agreement was that I would handle 100% of the night time parenting but he even ended up compromising there when we decided to start co-sleeping. Now, almost a year into this new adventure, David goes above and beyond any agreement we had originally made pre-baby.

As if he wasn't already doing more than I, as his homemaker wife, ever intended for him to have to do, since Thanksgiving he kicked it up yet another notch and has adopted the mentality that we are both working full time during the day and by the time he gets home we are equal. If I'm busy with Ayden or with a household task, he finds something to do. We are either both busy or both resting. Everything needs to get done and it really doesn't matter who does what as long as we are both working for the joint cause. We have now fallen into a wonderful routine in the evenings where one of us works on dinner while the other plays with Ayden, or if Ayden is in the mood to play by himself we'll cook together. After dinner David starts kitchen clean up while I supervise bath time. After bath time David joins us for books and snuggles, then I nurse Ayden to sleep/write my blog posts while David finishes up the kitchen and whatever else needs to be done. With this arrangement, both of us equally contributing, we are now able to relax together for a baby-free hour or two at the end of the day and it is wonderful.

I guess "they" really mean it when they say it takes the entire first year to really adjust and figure out your new roles and routines. Things have evolved slowly over time and with a lot of communication and compromise we have finally found a system that works for us. We can finally say that we are settled and that things are getting "easier."

I feel so lucky to have a spouse who is observant and willing to take initiative around the house. We have been together since we were teenagers, have witnessed each other grow up and I am so proud of the man my husband has become. He is a sweet, romantic husband, a loving, hands on father and he does everything he can to help take care of this little family of ours. Ayden has a wonderful role model in David and if he even becomes half the man his daddy is he will make some lady very lucky someday.

Any lady would be lucky to have this cuteness!
(I know from experience.)
"They" also say that parenthood is the most challenging yet most rewarding role you will ever take on and that is no joke. We have had many ups and downs over the past 11 months. We've had many arguments, usually on the days we are the most sleep-deprived, and many times when we've had to remind each other that we are on the same side. What is important is that we have really been in this together. I am proud to say that I am the mother I have always wanted to be and I have David, with his constant love and support, to thank for that. I could never begin to express my gratitude and love for my sweet husband. He is my #1 and makes my life complete.



  1. Love hearing this! You have a wonderful little family. Live only for each other and you will never fail! God Bless!

  2. Hey Sarah
    I've been following your blog since the begining and I love it! We are very similar and I can usually relate to you. I have to say though, that this blog entry broke my heart. Not for you, of course, but for myself. You see this, (what you have), is what I've always dreamed of. I've always wanted to be a mommy and stay at home with my babies. Unfortunately, quite the opposite happened to me. Long story short, my husband freaked out after our son was born and started drinking and doing drugs. He would come home drunk and I'd have to stay home with our son. Two days after giving birth I was in the bathroom having just got out of the shower and he came in. He stood in the doorway, looked me up and down, and then said," I'm never going to look at you the same way again". I waited for him to clarify, but he stood there in silence. I said" well I'm amazed at what my body has done", and then I went into our walk in closet and cried and cried. He never came to clarify or apologise. That was and still is the absolute cruelest thing anyone has ever said to me. I had a terrible time breastfeeding and was in excruiating pain for the first 8 weeks. I'd cry every time my son would nurse and all my ex told me was to quit and give him formula. (I'm glad to report that I never did give up and my son is now 25 months and we're still nursing). Those were just a couple things that still stand out in my mind, there were so many more. I don't mean for this to be a pity party, obviously I just chose a very bad person to be my husband. Instead wanted to thank you, because in a little way I still feel like I can live the life I've always wanted, even if its just through a blog written by someone who lives multiple states away, whom I've never met. You make me feel like I still get to experience my dream a little. So thank you.

    1. Oh Rachael, don't give up on finding someone who will love you for you! I can't imagine a husband saying that to his wife after she carried and birthed his child. I would have been devastated too! As spouses we carry a lot of power when it comes to our partners and if abused it can do so much damage. You are so strong to have overcome that kind of relationship and it is amazing that you are still breastfeeding, even without a strong support system. That says so much about you and what a wonderful mother you are! So many women would have just given in. Thank you for sharing your story and don't give up on finding your David!

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